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Dim Light

Nine more days to Christmas. Shopping malls are fill with people doing their present shopping and to ensure they got the best gift for their love ones. But in the spirit of Christmas, it is not just about giving someone whom you care and love expensive stuff.

It is about the moment that you spend with them from the start till 25th December. Decorating the Christmas tree, making plans together for Christmas eve and spending quality time together by taking a week of leave from work; that is what matters.

Sometimes, it is about being truthful towards each other before Christmas because you want to celebrate it with a clean slate. None to hide, nothing to be scare of. It might be the worst gift before Christmas; sincerity; but it depends upon how you would accept it.

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A Girl, Football and Soccer

Being an insecure girl, many things that she would demand her boyfriend to do in order to put away the impossible thoughts to the darkness. By deleting precious memories of the boyfriend with his ex, tailing every number in his phone, lurking around his Facebook and monitor his tweets; so far he comply like a moon on an axis.

He is heaven but even in real heaven you have comply with one rule; which ignites the temptation to break it. In his case, forbidding him to watch football with his friends is the forbidden apple. That is the fine line of a guy’s retention to fulfill request from the girl whom he would ditch; like a car with a bad handle; due to your stiffness.

Perhaps you can join him or perhaps you let his friends come to your place to watch the match on your 40 inch LCD television with 5.1 Dolby digital surround sound and believe me; your place will be their heaven and in exchange, the forbidden fruit is just wait for a bite.

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Dear Girlfriend

Dear girlfriend,

Thank you for accepting me into your heart, for letting me to love you, for making me the luckiest guy in the world and for having me able to craft myself around your love.

Dear girlfriend,

I know the insecurities that you’re having when I’m not around. Your wild imagination would whisper some stories about me and cause you to be worry about me. Here, I assure you that there is no possibility that I would walk away. I would put you as my priority in everything that I do. If I ever go out with someone, I’ll text, FourSquare-ed and even tweet about it so you can check up on me on random times to make sure you’re relief.

Dear girlfriend,

It is alright if you want to be clingy around me because it shows that I’m important. If you want to be clingy, don’t over do it. I will not be mad but I’ll be more clingier than you are so that you will loose. I want to be the winner in our relationship so you know that I’m serious about us and I won’t take you for granted.

Dear girlfriend,

Do take care and love yourself as how you love me. Every time I text you a long morning text, do reply even it is just a “K” just to know you’re still there in the end of the line. If you feel that I have made you upset, go and tell it straight to us because us, boys, are not born to understand silent treatment as we believe effective communication is the key of a long-term relationship.

Dear girlfriend,

Do learn to believe me because I already believe and putting my hope in you; as faith makes us stronger.

Dear girlfriend,

I love you with all my heart and nothing could tear us apart; except death.

I Once Meant Everything To You

He met her after a long break up.

He told her, “Sorry, I've met a new one. I have a new girlfriend and another future.. How about your life?”.

She closed her eyes to hide her tears, remembered all the memories she shared with him.

She remembered how she shared his pain before his happy moments and how she refused many other boys just to stay with him.

She kept the remains of her pride and collected her force, smiled and said, ”Sorry sir, but do i know you ?”.

                                                                                    -Tumblr

Make a move

Personally, I think we do have an attraction but due to current condition that we are facing right now really change our way to foresee our next move.

Whatever it is, I’ll try to settle this thing once and for all before it become too late; right now I felt quite “there’s-stuff-that-seems-not-right”. One of us has disappear somewhere with one of the element factor of the decision making situation.

Hope not.

Currently, why heart sing this song.

Taylor Swift – You Belong With Me

You're on the phone
With your girlfriend, she's upset
She’s going off about
Something that you said
But she doesn't
Get your humor like I do

I'm in my room,
It's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listen to the kind of
Music she doesn't like
And she'll never
know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts,
I wear t-shirts
She's cheer captain
And I`m on the bleachers
Dreaming 'bout the day
When you wake up and find
That what you`re looking for
Has been here the whole time

If you could see that
I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along
so why can't you see
You belong with me,
you belong with me

Walk in the streets
With you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking
This is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench,
Thinking to myself
Hey isn't this easy

And you've got a smile
That could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while
Since she brought you down
You say you're fine
I know you better than that
Hey whatcha doing
With a girl like that?

She wears high heels,
I wear sneakers,
She's cheer captain
And I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming 'bout the day
When you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
Has been here the whole time

If you could see that
I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along
So why can't you see
You belong with me

Standing by and
Waiting at your back door
All this time
How could you not know baby?
You belong with me,
You belong with me

Oh, I remember you drivin' to my house
In the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh,
When you know you're 'bout to cry
I know your favorite songs
And you tell me 'bout your dreams
Think I know where you belong,
think I know it's with me

Can't you see that
I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along,
So why can't you see
You belong with me

Standing by
And waiting at your back door
All this time
How could you not know Baby?
You belong with me,
You belong with me
You belong with me

Have you ever thought just maybe?
You belong with me
You belong with me

Lazy

Lots of my classmates are struggling to understand of what are being taught by the lecturers in the class.

But they quite mad at my attitude recently. All because they said that I’m not full utilizing my gift.

What gift?

Taking their quote, “ Rahman, you’re like smart and have this brain which could absorb almost anything immediately. But the thing is….your lazy. If I were you and if I have the same ability as you are, I would just like studying only. Aren’t you want to achieve Dean’s List this sem?”.

Well, basically what they told me is true.

I’M LAZY.

They are what is you

Friends are important. There are friends to hang-out, for group studying even there is friends for watching football together.

But the thing that I want to highlight here is the people whom you are mingle with.

Without you realizing it, the will reflect on what you will become. Either it will affect your attitude, characteristic or even your future path.

Thank God, through the entire journey of my life I’ve been stumbled upon people who really made me what I am today.

I was just an ordinary boy, thinking immaturely and always gave childish act or answer. You will feel astonish on how this bunch of people taught me the meaning of life; from my taste of music, food, place, ideology etc.

Unfortunately, not all of us as lucky as I am. Loads of them ended up with a bunch of bastards who only know the meaning of”LET’S ENJOY AND HAVE FUN 24/7” without thinking the consequences and the effect to their friends.

They taught you something which is really bad indeed without teaching you the good substance to make it balance; at least mine did.

It is really sad indeed seeing somebody that you really care so much change and it keep on changing themselves in the name of “Because they’re my friends.”.

Perhaps these bunch of people just sees you as a ticket to a goldmine or even a back stage package. Let see if you have those thing at the first place; would they actually want to approach you at the beginning?

Yet, lot of people when they meet up with new friends they tend to leave the old ones even without realizing them doing it. Giving an excuses such as “I need to care about my new friends feeling too…” isn’t acceptable especially when the old friends knew you way more longer than the new “ones”.

Hence, sometimes we must be aware of these matter because by choosing your social circle, it is either you end up JUST LIKE THEM or realizing it before it’s too late.

Late night call...

Finally I decided to solve the matter once and for all. For goodness sake, for 2 weeks in a row my head just kept on thinking about her. I need to settle things up so that I would continuing my life without once actually thinking of her and cause my productivity to decrease.

*dialling her number once* but no one answer....

*dialling her number twice* but no one answer....

*dialling her number for the third time* but no one answer....

Hence, I texted her saying, "Please answer the phone. I need to talk to you. That's it".

After I sent it, I try to call her again for the fourth time and.....

Hanim: Hello?

Me : Sorry to disturb you around this time Hanim but we need to talk, try to settle things up.

Hanim: But I'm really sleepy right now. Sleepy indeed *the funny thing is she didn't sounds sleepy at all*

Me : We need to settle things up before anything happens. Just answer my question please? I need to know about something. Is that guy is your new boyfriend? *my heart bled when I asked her that question*

Hanim: I felt really sleepy indeed Black...

Me : Hanim, we need to talk. Just answer me, would you?

Hanim: *hungs up*

So basically, you know which side try to avoid the problem; and try to run away from facing it compared to which side try to face the problem and try to settle things down.

But I won't giving up on trying to talk to her about this matter. Because at the end, I'm the one whom have the strength to make a grave upon it.

Just think I did have the week of my life...

Just then, PR called me.

PR:
I just saw your blog (referring to The Elite Club). It's quite good I say

Me :
Oh, thank you...*felt strange on PR's sudden call*

PR:
But ermmm Black. Could you please watch out the blog? Cause you see, later *authority* knows it's quite....you know.

Me :
Yes PR. I understand *thinking WTF, (authority) just buzz off*

PR:
Man, I'm sorry to say this to you. I know you look highly to The Debate Club. But please, control the blog okay. I mean, I myself are quite hate this type of conversation. But I'm just telling you about this matter. I'm sorry man.

Me : It's okay PR...no sweat. *darn! Is this meaning I need to shut down the site?*

But you know what I did? Yes, I'll control the post to TEC but then, I create a new blog for TDC itself. It was title:

The Debate Club